sorrow and joy

well at last you can see my smiling face and the beautiful hannah. we are just a couple of metres outside innocence and alexandra's house about to walk off for an afternoon together. i have been in an internet cafe for over 2 hours trying to work out how to get more pictures to you but sorry i give up. i think the connection is just too slow for uploading pictures - i will try again in south africa.
i am now happily settled in a beautiful guesthouse in blantyre, where i will spend up to a week taking time to mull over my memories and thoughts of mozambique, and enjoying the sights and sounds of another african country. i have travelled here with bernadette who will leave a bit before me, but it is so lovely to have this extra time with her. she really does a fantastic work in mocuba with a pre-school for 75 children aged 3-6 years, mostly orphans. see her website for more info http://www.wijnands-bcs.nl/africa/engels/bernadette-engels.htm
i have received an e-mail from innocence since leaving letting me know that his nephew also died later the same day as his sister's funeral. i never met the child, but he had been in hospital for at least a couple of weeks and he had been getting worse and worse instead of better. i don't know what he died of but when a large town only has one doctor and the nurses require extra payment in order to do their job properly, what can you expect.
so i am still so full of sadness for innocence and his family, and already trying to figure out how i can get back to mozambique sooner than the 6 year gap it had been before this visit.
just so you know - my mosquito bites are not bothering me so much now, i am tired but fine about that, i am not so hot in malawi and very thankful for that, i feel so healthy it is lovely, brown and a bit slimmer. my nose is suffering though, peeling everyday from sunburn despite using suncream. i still dream about people from home - early this morning i woke from a particularly stressful dream about my old job at citygate.. jan was ill, kirsty was too busy.. it was funny to wake up and realise my brain is still processing things from home even here. but i find it so much easier to remember home now and just enjoy thinking of so many lovely people, taking the time to pray for lots of you and enjoying the knowledge of your love and care even from a distance. thank you so much for the many comments here and e-mails, i can't reply to enough of them but i am reading them all and it is so lovely to hear news and know i am not forgotten. despite the sadness i am still very happy - its funny but i think it is possible to know joy and sorrow at the same time, that is my experience today.